When Life Changes: Navigating Transitions with Support and Self-Compassion

Navigating transition as a woman can be tough...

Understanding the Complexity of Change

Change is one of the few constants in life, and yet it can feel anything but steady. Even the changes we actively choose, like starting a new job, ending a relationship, moving to a new city, or becoming a parent, can all unsettle our sense of stability. These moments often carry a mix of emotions: excitement and grief, relief and anxiety, hope and fear. Transitions

that are sudden or outside of our control, such as the loss of a loved one, a health diagnosis, or an unexpected career shift can be even more stressful. They can leave us feeling like the rug has been pulled out from under us. In both types of transitions, there's often a sense of losing what was known, predictable, or safe.

Life transitions can disrupt more than just our routines; they can shake the foundation of who we believe ourselves to be. These periods can bring up complicated questions around identity, meaning, purpose, and belonging. You might find yourself wondering, "Who am I now that everything is different?" or "What if I don’t feel how I thought I would?" You might feel both relief and grief, excitement and fear all at once. This emotional challenge is not a sign that something is wrong. It’s a sign that something important is shifting.

Emotional and Nervous System Responses to Transitions

During transitions, our nervous system can interpret uncertainty as a threat, triggering stress responses like hypervigilance, fatigue, difficulty sleeping, or withdrawal. Even if the change is welcome, it can still register as a disruption to our internal sense of safety. It’s common to experience anxiety, hopelessness, irritability, or emotional numbness. You may feel stuck between where you were and where you're going, what’s often called a “liminal space,” where clarity hasn’t yet arrived, and the familiar has already fallen away.

These moments can also stir up old wounds or unresolved experiences from earlier in life. That’s because transitions, especially those involving loss, uncertainty, or a sense of starting over can act like mirrors, reflecting not just what’s happening now but also what has happened before. Even positive changes can carry emotional weight when they bump up against long-held beliefs about what you’re allowed to want, what you think you deserve, or whether it’s safe to hope. Our nervous systems remember, sometimes more vividly than our minds do. So, when you find yourself reacting strongly to a current change, it might not be just about the present moment. Often, it's a layered emotional experience shaped by the stories, patterns, and protective strategies we’ve carried with us over time.

Letting Go of “Shoulds”

We often carry unspoken expectations about how we “should” handle change; quietly, efficiently, without disrupting anyone else. There’s a cultural script that tells us to stay strong, stay productive, and “get over it” as quickly as possible. But the truth is, transitions are inherently disruptive. They ask us to let go of what’s familiar before we fully know what’s coming next. That liminal space, the in-between can feel confusing, even when the change is something we wanted. You might feel pressure to “have it all figured out,” to explain your feelings neatly, or to present a version of yourself that seems fine. But real growth rarely looks like a straight line. It often involves discomfort, doubt, and periods of emotional messiness. Making room for your real experience messy, contradictory, or uncertain as it may be is a powerful first step toward healing and integration. It’s okay if you’re not okay right now. Honoring your truth, rather than rushing past it, is where real resilience begins.

Journalling to process change can be helpful

Ways to Cope With Life Transitions

Two practices that can be especially grounding during transitions are journaling and mindfulness. Journaling offers a space to untangle the swirl, naming what you’re feeling, what you're afraid of, or what you're longing for can create a sense of emotional relief and perspective. It doesn’t need to be daily or structured; even a few honest lines can help you feel more anchored. Mindfulness, on the other hand, helps you come back to the present when your thoughts are spinning toward the future or past. Something as simple as noticing your breath, feeling your feet on the ground, or taking a mindful pause in the middle of your day can remind you: I’m here, and I’m doing the best I can.

Therapy provides a space to slow down and make sense of the swirl. You don’t have to figure it all out alone. In sessions, we can explore what this transition is bringing up for you, not just on the surface, but underneath. Maybe there are fears around failure, loss of control, or disappointing others. Maybe parts of you feel hopeful and motivated while others are overwhelmed or avoidant. All of that deserves space.

Therapeutic Approaches That Support Change

At Dragonfly, we draw from a range of therapeutic approaches tailored to your needs. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is one evidence-based modality that can be particularly helpful during times of transition. Major life changes often bring up heightened stress, uncertainty, and self-doubt. CBT helps you explore the link between your thoughts, emotions, and behaviours especially when you find yourself caught in unhelpful patterns like catastrophizing (“I’ll never adjust to this”), black-and-white thinking (“If this doesn’t go perfectly, I’ve failed”), or self-blame (“This is all my fault”). During transitions, it’s common for our thoughts to become more rigid or fear-based as we try to regain control in the face of the unknown. CBT supports you in identifying these thought patterns and learning how to respond to them with more flexibility and self-compassion.

We may also integrate principles from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which invites you to make room for your thoughts and feelings rather than avoiding or fighting them. ACT places an emphasis on identifying your core values and using them as a guide when making decisions during uncertain times. The process isn’t about having no fear; it’s about taking meaningful action even with fear present. This helps you build psychological flexibility and move through change with intention.

Moving Forward at Your Own Pace

You don’t need to rush your way through change. The goal isn’t to "bounce back," but to move forward in a way that feels authentic and sustainable. Transitions might be challenging, but they also hold the potential for clarity, healing, and growth. If you're in the thick of change and feeling lost or unsure of your footing, therapy can help you reconnect with your sense of direction not by giving you all the answers, but by helping you listen more deeply to yourself and choose the next step with intention.

You Are Not Alone

Whatever you’re navigating, you don’t have to do it alone. At Dragonfly, we are here to support you as you move through the uncertainty toward whatever comes next.